I- With the Lord's leading, I am attempting to:
     (A) shed light on some of the reasons that have definitely caused confusion over 
            the past  30 to 40 years;
     (B) be concise, yet ... complete enough, to answer your questions.

1- The first section is, "obvious reasons" that are causing confusion:
    ** reasons "fundamental" pastors give for remarriage creating confusion which     
         are deeply buried spiritual fault lines because they are unknown to the
         listener.  **This section was updated June 19, 2007

       ** reasons "Christian" husbands and wives give for their remarriages  which,
            to the hearer, should be clearly visible spiritual fault lines. 

2- The second section is, "subtle ERRORS" that are major reasons for confusion:

The doctrinal errors which, when compared with the Word of God, are clearly visible spiritual fault lines.
[A] Salvation covers this sin;
[B] Unrepentant immoral spouse is a justifiable reason for remarriage;
[C] Desertion by an unsaved spouse is a justifiable reason for remarriage;
[D] The sin of presumption.

3- The third section is the "Word of God, building on the Rock with no Spiritual 
     fault lines" with my personal commentaries.  The following is the heart and soul 
     of this issue.
            There are four (4) irrevocable roadblocks to remarriage while a divorced 
            spouse is still living:
[A = #1] The Word of God;
[B = #2] The irrevocable one flesh relationship;
            **What is the seriousness of the "one Flesh Relationship"
[C = #3] The irrevocable wedding vows;
[D = #4] The irrevocable "known" -- consensual sexual intimacy before marriage.
[E] Salvation is free but living our Christian life is not free & never has been free.
      [a] Before His crucifixion Jesus WARNED ALL to -
           "count the cost of discipleship" before making a decision to follow Him;
      [b] After His crucifixion Jesus WARNED the CHURCH to          
            "count the cost of the Christian life and obedience."

THE QUESTION OF ETERNAL SECURITY / SECURITY OF THE BELIEVER  
and divorced  and remarried.

FIRST SECTION
""SOME VERY OBVIOUS REASONS FOR CONFUSION""

"Roads to certain disaster"

Isaiah 3:12b
"O my people, they which lead thee cause thee to err,
and destroy the way of thy paths."

(1-A)
 "Comments from MANY - fundamental(?) Pastors(?)"

Over the years I have heard the following comments from Pastor after Pastor from Michigan to Florida; from Florida to Arizona; and from Arizona to Washington State.

The following quotes are not hearsay but are quotes from personal conversations I have had with Senior Pastors and Assistant Pastors.  The following comments certainly reveal deeply  buried... spiritual fault  lines:

**A number of years ago I had a very serious injury due to an industrial accident.  A Pastor in a neighboring city thought it would be very helpful if my wife and I became members of his ministry and gave him a helping hand.  Before joining his ministry I gave him my "Philosophy of Ministry" manuscript that gives great detail about our convictions concerning divorce and divorce / remarriage.  After several months of helping the ministry by teaching a singles and married couples class, one of the deacons called and asked to meet with me at a restaurant that was convenient to both of us so we could talk.  He started the conversation by telling me that he was divorced and remarried and "he was very sure that my wife and I were not aware of his situation."  He also wanted us to know that at the next annual business meeting, of the five men to be considered for the "Office of Deacon," three were divorced men whose divorced wives were still living and that two of those men would certainly be elected.  The majority of the Deacon's Board would... then be ...divorced and remarried men whose divorced wives were still living.

When I confronted their Pastor, this is what I was told:
"Brother.  When I graduated from Seminary I didn't believe in divorce and remarriage while a divorced spouse was still alive.  In my very first ministry I was confronted with the issue and I had to make a decision.   Because I believed that the Lord had called me to preach and ... because I had a family to feed, I made the decision to preach and feed my family". 

Over the past 35 years, many Pastors have said "to me" ... the following:

**"Brother, if I preached Romans 7:2-4, "For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband. [3] So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has married another man. [4] Therefore, my brethren, you also have become dead to the law through the body of Christ, that you may be married to another--to Him who was raised from the dead, that we should bear fruit to God." And 1 Corinthians 7:39, "A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord,"  as a hard and fast interpretation, I wouldn't have a church left."

Personal note:  I was called and installed in my very first ministry (I was 37 years old, married with three sons in school) by a 100% vote of acceptance.  I had no idea that over 90% of the membership and visitors were divorced and remarried.  I was Pastor for over 6-months when the Lord gave me a message concerning the sanctity and permanence of marriage and when I TEARFULLY AND FEARFULLY said to Him, "Lord, if I preach that message 90% of the members and visitors will not return for the evening service -- HE REMAINED --SILENT (it was His Church, not mine).  Guess what, I was correct and after He and I found fundamental Church (upper case "C") families for the faithful, we closed that church (lower case "c") several months later.  I had three sons in school and no income, I never asked anyone for financial help, not our home church and not even my home missionary board -- and the mail box began filling up with letters containing checks from folks I had never met in my life.  We never missed a single meal, paid all of our responsibilities in full and on time from that day to this.  Our God doesn't fail His servants!!  When our God calls -- He empowers!  When He empowers -- He picks up the pieces and pays the bills!!!  I'm now 65 years old!

**"When I graduated from Seminary I didn't agree with divorce and remarriage while a divorced spouse was still alive..."but"  the Church that called me had those folks as members."

**"When I graduated from Seminary I didn't agree with divorce and remarriage while a divorced spouse was still alive..."but" all of the other men in my area [conference, denomination, association etc.] are doing it."

**"When I graduated from Seminary I didn't agree with divorce/remarriage while a divorced spouse was still alive..."but" the members of my congregation told me over and over again that Dr. Herb Vander Lugt, Radio Bible Class, Dr. Charles Swindoll and Dr. James Dobson, Focus on the Family all teach that God's mercy and grace covers this."

**Dr. James Dobson

I have in my files a document that I received from Dr. Dobson's  Director, Office of the President, dated May 1, 1996 that states that Dr. Swindoll is the author of Dr. Dobson's convictions concerning divorce and remarriage.  His Director also enclosed  Dr. Swindoll's 1981 booklet entitled "When It All Comes Tumbling Down"; Multnomah Press; ISBN 0-930014-64-2 for his documentation.  I have been unable to personally speak with Dr. Dobson concerning his "remarriage" position.  The reason for the letter and booklet was that his Director had previously written to me that, "Dr. Dobson isn't a theologian, he's a psychologist.  He has deferred his position concerning remarriage to Dr. Swindoll who is a theologian."

When I read his explanation over a decade ago, my thought then and remains the same today, "what an incredible admission.  Dr. Dobson's whole radio, television, seminar, authored books and booklet ministries are theologically founded and known as 'family ministry'".

Sadly, in 2001, Ryan Dobson, Dr. Dobson's son, divorced his wife.  It was said then and since his divorce that he was totally against his own divorce because he believed and stated that "his divorce was without Biblical grounds".  Why then did Ryan remarry?  Further, wouldn't it seem reasonable that Focus on the Family and Dr. Dobson would not allow Ryan, a man who is now living in sin according to their own stated theology, to have any part or position in their ministries?   

Folks, each and every one of us live with and experience God's Biblical "Law of the Harvest"...law.  I love Dr. Dobson and Focus on the Family.  It isn't my desire to "throw the baby out with the bath water" though -- I must confess to you --  I have lost confidence in his and their integrity.  The lesson and reality is that he is now another example of what happens when we teach and allow ourselves to believe any inaccurate doctrine (heresy).   God initiated His eternal "Law of the Harvest" (Read Genesis chapter 3) at the very beginning of creation and He warns us to:

"Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it spring the issues of life." (Proverbs 4:23)
 
"Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap." (Galatians 6:7)

What is the law of the harvest?

1- We reap what we sow, i.e., we plant corn and we reap corn;
2- We always reap more than we sow, i.e., we plant a kernel of corn and reap a stalk with "many ears" of corn;
3- We never reap in the same season that we sow, i.e. we plant in the spring and we reap in the fall.

Because we reap what we plant at a much later time and date than when the sin was sown, we very often feel blindsided {Why did this happen to me?) by the results of our sins.  Consider Ryan Dobson, Dr. Dobson and Focus on the Family and their present situation for our understanding:

In the Spring of Dr. Dobson's ministry he asked for, accepted and followed Dr. Swindoll's counsel.   For many years (the following seasons), Dr. Swindoll, Dr. Dobson and Focus on the Family have continued teaching the heresy that there are exceptions to God's marriage commands.  Now it is the Fall years of Dr. Dobson's ministry and -- Ryan Dobson, his son, has followed his Dad's doctrine and not the Lord's and has remarried in total disobedience to the Word of God.  Do we now understand the law of the harvest?

Please consider rule #2, "we always reap more than we sow" i.e.  they are now teaching to all who know them and sit under their ministries that divorce and remarriage is acceptable with God.  Can anyone possibly know how many have in the past and will, in the future, divorce and remarry in violation of the Word of God due to his example?

Questions:

**Parents, do we really want to destroy a marriage and the lives within our marriage through divorce?
**Do we really desire to have the marriages of our adult children, grandchildren etc. become a divorce tragedy?

The New Testament Scriptures were written in Koiné Greek, which was the common, everyday, working people's -- Greek language.   The Word of God isn't written so that only Doctors of Theology can understand it but is "God's text book" and "God's manual" for-and-to the common, everyday working person, you and me.  Our easy-to-read Bible clearly teaches the Biblical permanence and sanctity / holiness of marriage.  That this Doctor {who is a University graduate with a doctoral degree] is entrusting the very foundation of his total ministry to the thoughts and convictions of some other man and -- hasn't trusted his own personal Lord to correctly direct his personal convictions for his own  ministry is a serious violation of 1 John 2:26-27, "These things I have written to you concerning those who try to deceive you. [27] But the anointing which you have received from Him abides in you, and you do not need that anyone teach you; but as the same anointing teaches you concerning all things, and is true, and is not a lie, and just as it has taught you, you will abide in Him."

If you take nothing else away from this page, please take this:
Our God is our personal one-on-one God.  He keeps no secrets from His children and He -- personally -- instructs all who will obey Him James 1:5, "If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him."

Second hand theology -- is -- like second hand gossip.  The information -- is -- never the same at the end as it started and -- it is -- always distorted and damaged information.

**Dr. Herb Vander Lugt

Dr. Vander Lugt died December 2, 2006

The Daily Bread Tribute

October of 1999, I have in my files the lengthy email discussion with  Dr. Herb Vander Lugt of the Radio Bible Class, who, at that time was a leading Christian radio and publications minister.  He wrote to me (and I have his email on file) that he didn't disagree with the texts or verses that I provided or -- the conclusions that I presented to him.  He continued with that he had difficulty... with a "hard and fast" interpretation of the Word of God ...because he felt that anything beyond praying for these folks and accepting divorce and remarriage as a fact of life in today's society was... in his opinion  (verbatim and not my addition)..."too harsh".  When I asked him if he was telling me that "God was too harsh" concerning (1) His will for the nation of Israel as recorded in Ezra 10:3 "Now therefore let us make a covenant with our God to put away all the wives, and such as are born of them, according to the counsel of my lord, and of those that tremble at the commandment of our God; and let it be done according to the law".  And (2) His command to Noah and his family as recorded for us in Hebrews 11:7 "By faith Noah, being divinely warned of things not yet seen, moved with godly fear, prepared an ark for the saving of his household, by which he condemned the world and became heir of the righteousness which is according to faith," and again 1 Peter 3:20, "Who formerly were disobedient, when once the Divine long suffering waited in the days of Noah, while the ark was being prepared, in which a few, that is, eight souls, were saved through water,"  Dr. Vander Lugt  would not give me an answer.

Later that same month, after I had completed the lengthy email discussion  with Dr. Vander Lugt,  I experienced one of my most frustrating situations in ministry.  In answer to my request that the leadership of the Radio Bible Class ask Dr. Vander Lugt to reconsider his remarriage position, one of his directors who was a member of a very large fundamental church in Michigan sent me an email saying that the Senior Pastor of the church that he is a member of did not agree with remarriage when a divorced spouse was still living and he (the Senior Pastor)  wouldn't perform weddings for the divorced folks in that situation -- "but," the Assistant Pastor saw nothing wrong with those marriages and -- did perform weddings for the divorced -- in their church sanctuary.  He concluded with - "and, our church membership doesn't have any problem with this arrangement."  (Please read  Hebrews 13:17; 1 Corinthians 1:10; 1 Corinthians 14:33)

Is it any wonder that the world scoffs at the Christian community and the Word of God?

**A young, struggling Pastor said... "I'm just parroting what the others are saying."

**An Associate Pastor of Christian Education of a large fundamental Baptist Church in Colorado made the following statement to my wife and me after asking me for a concise statement summing up divorce and remarriage:  "Brother, wouldn't it be nice if we could base our "policies" on the Word of God rather than "convenience?"  Incredibly, realizing and acknowledging this sin, he remained as the Associate Pastor of Christian Education.

*A pastor from Wisconsin wrote, "Brother, I preached the Word of God concerning the permanence and sanctity of marriage.  From the Word of God I explained to my members that the vows "until death do us part" spoken at their weddings when they were married can not be dissolved until death.  I read and preached to them that the "one flesh relationship" created by God in marriage can not be dissolved until the death of a spouse.  Later that week I was called before our denominational regional directors and told that if I didn't reconsider my position concerning this controversial subject ... they would consider the revocation of my "Ordination Certificate" as a Minister of the Word of God and my "Preacher's License".   

A foot note to this Pastor's dilemma:  I praise the Lord that I can report to you that one week later the Lord provided him with a part time job, complete with a "living wage" and a paid "family benefits package" to encourage him and protect his income and his family needs regardless of what the church or his regional directors decided to do.  Another man in the community noticed that his vehicle was in need of repairs, bought his broken down vehicle for a ridiculous amount of money with the words, "now you can afford a good car."   PTL!

This Brother wrote the following follow up:

"We are growing one person at a time, and the first thing I hit is the marriage covenant.  I want all new ones to know where we stand.  It's funny, a babe in the Lord just says...yup, I see it; but that old crusty, tradition laden attender ... just does not want to hear it."

Please note:  The following reason: "I made the decision to preach and feed my family" is -- BY FAR --.the most used excuse that I have heard from pastors, violating the clear Word of God.

QUESTION:  Are any of the above reasons given to me by pastors, BIBLICAL REASONS?

Is it possible that one of these ministers may have been your very own pastor or the minister who officiated at your wedding.  Tell me, shouldn't all of the listed reasons given for violating their original convictions be considered  as "very serious, deeply buried spiritual fault lines" on which you and others have built their earthly and eternal futures upon?  

PERSONAL NOTE:  By printing the reasons that I have personally been given by my peers [Pastor / Shepherds] -- I am in no way trying to demean the man or his ministry.  I am attempting to make you aware that imperfect men make less than desirable decisions for reasons that are far from godly and cause others to sin and fail in their personal lives, the lives of their families, friends, acquaintances and cause others to follow their examples and sin and fail, also.

When you and I are personally kneeling before our Lord and Saviour we will never have the privilege of shifting our personal responsibility for any decisions to someone else.  When asked by our Lord why we did -- or -- did not do, say or think something.

Can you imagine Christ honoring the following answers?

Jesus, Dr. James Dobson told me _____________________ .

Or,  Jesus, my Dad said _____________________ .

How about, Jesus, Dr. John MacArthur, said _____________________ .

There's no doubt in my mind that many are going to say Jesus, my Pastor said ______________.

The word of God already gives us the answer 2 Corinthians 5:10, "For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may be recompensed for his deeds in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad," teaches each of us that we and we alone will answer for our decisions, good and bad. 

Having said this, it must also be stated that there are some who, against all they know and believe will -- for personal gain alone -- do, say and promote ungodly positions and teachings in this life. 

Acts 20:30
"Also of your own selves shall men arise,
speaking perverse things,
to draw away disciples after them." 

This is my personal Mailbox for Email.
How can I encourage you?

_______________________________________________________________________

1-B
"REASONS - Christian - HUSBANDS AND WIVES
HAVE GIVEN ME FOR THEIR REMARRIAGE"

Over the years I have been told the following ... by men and women ... "humanoids" who are just like you and me.   The statements below represent only a few of the countless throng of humanity, who remarried and now their conscience won't let them sleep at night and they are miserable when they think about their marriage during the day.  The following comments reveal deeply buried and clearly visible... spiritual fault lines:

**When I grew up I was taught that remarriage was a sin.  When I got married I believed that my marriage was "until death do us part."   That is what I was taught and that is what I believed.

**My spouse was a drunk [or abusive; a  lazy-good-for-nothing, etc.] so we got a divorce.  My friends told me that I hadn't done anything wrong and I certainly didn't deserve to be single the rest of my life.  I knew... my ... Pastor wouldn't remarry me... "so I found a preacher who would.  

**I'm a man and... I have needs you know.

**I'm a woman and... I have needs you know.

**I have kids to raise and it isn't fair that I should have to raise them all by myself no matter what anyone says.

**I didn't want a divorce but he / she left me.  I am not going to live alone.

**My spouse was guilty of adultery so I got a divorce and remarried.

**After my divorce I didn't know how I would survive.  The Lord brought a wonderful Christian into my life and we got married.

**After my divorce I met a wonderful person.  I was sure that my Pastor wouldn't consider marrying us so, I was prepared to find a preacher who would.  Before I did that I went to my own Pastor and asked if he would marry us.  I was shocked when he told me that he had recently changed his mind concerning remarriage.  He performed the wedding for us.

These are only a few of the excuses that I have been given for why folks have remarried in violation of what they were taught and what they knew was true, all of which... create a great deal of confusion for themselves and others.  If your conscience is kicking you around the block because you're guilty of doing one of the above just so you could get married while your divorced spouse is still living, you know exactly what you must do.