1. Before shopping do I have any predisposed goals and expectations in mind concerning the store that  I’m going to shop at.

Can the same thing be said about visitors in our worship services? 

2. While traveling to the grocery store I'm very mindful of the vehicles and drivers that are around me enroute to the store.

QUESTION:
As a member of our Church family, what are my driving habits especially if I have a "Jesus Saves" or "Jesus is my Co-Pilot" or the "fish symbol" sticker on my vehicle?  As a visiting Pastor enroute to Churches for Pulpit Supply or -- simply as a visitor, more times than I care to remember, I’ve noted rude and obnoxious drivers that are driving near and around me and then – I  followed them into the church parking lot.

3. When we enter the grocery store parking, lot were we forced to dodge enthusiastic and rude    drivers who seem to have only one thing in mind, "You're in my way and I'm in a hurry to find the very best parking place - right next to the building"?  As a Church member, what are my parking lot driving habits like?  Please allow me to share a personal pet-peeve.  For  anyone other than the "handicap," why are there reserved parking spaces in our parking lots.  Pastor, member, are we not supposed to be servants to all and not ruler over, all?

4. As we walked into the grocery store and someone with a smile greeted us with, "Thank you for coming to our store" and then handed us a flyer (in our churches it's a church bulletin) -- did they show you around or introduce you to someone who did?   How do we greet and seat our visitors?

Please allow me to share one more personal pet-peeve. We've walked into church after church looking for a seat only to discover that seating is reserved by Bibles, coats, etc, forcing us to sit at the very rear of the sanctuary.  Choir members and Church leaders, we are servants to and of the membership and visitors, not rulers and or special people.  This practice makes visitors feel totally unwelcome!!  If you're a choir member and the sanctuary is full, Pastor -- have enough common sense to instruct the choir to remain in the choir loft or -- have reserved choir family seating in the rear of the sanctuary.

 5. Just as in the grocery store as we find our own way around -- were we met with crowded     aisles of  enthusiastic, rushing and smiling people?  Did we even get bumped and  thumped? Did some folks smile in our direction and yet, they said nothing to us?  While  in the store did we hear the store manager's voice over the P.A. assuring us that he cares about our shopping experience and he desires to personally serve us?  In fact, we walked by him and observed him standing in his  manager's cubicle.  Isn't it strange that he {like many Pastors) and Church Family leaders never left  his place behind his desk to come down to meet us or shake our hand?  Why is that?

6. Before we left the store, we were asked to pay?  Pastor and Church family member, I'm going to make a suggestion based upon my own convictions and experience.  Never ask a visitor to contribute to our membership love offerings.  When you have visitors in your home, do you ask them for a financial gift?  Our operating expenses are our responsibility and not, our visitors.  Please make this fact very clear to our visitors.  Too often I have been told by folks who have visited New Testament Church worship services with the condemning statement, "They didn't care about me or my family what-so-ever!  All they wanted was my money!"  Yes, we need funds to continue our ministries but not our visitor's funds.

7. As we leave the store, does someone say with a smile, "It was so nice that you came to shop in our store today?  Did you find everything that you were looking for?  Please hurry back."  We know they are really saying "We need your business $$$$$.  It's our job security.”   

What do the visitors of our worship services think and tell others when they leave our Church?  

8. After shopping at the local grocery store or visiting a local Church family we again end up in the parking lot and people are usually all around us. Did anyone show an interest in us or talk to us?

9. We located our vehicle and -- after dodging enthusiastic and rude drivers who seemed to have only one thing in mind "You're in my way and I'm in a hurry to get out of here"....we found a safe way out of the parking lot and went home. I truly do not like admitting the following:  As a general rule my wife and I have found that, as a visitor leaving worship  services, it is wise to for us to "safely sit in our vehicle and wait" for the initial  membership  rush to leave, then we leave the church parking lot. 

How is it in your church parking lot? 

10. After arriving home from the grocery store and relaxing, did we think about our shopping  experience?  When given any opportunities -- do we tell others all about our experience, good or  bad?  Do we really believe that visitors of our worship services will respond any differently when asked questions about our Church family when given the opportunity to talk to others?

Pastors, Christians, Church members and Church leaders:

Our worship services are Spiritual ministries for the Spiritually ill which includes you, me and all visitors.  We are Spiritual Hospitals not entertainment centers.  All who enter need the Word of God ministered with clarity, and Pastors, that's our responsibility Nehemiah chapter 8 and 2 Timothy chapter 4.  They need meat and potato "sermons" for the lost onto salvation and for Christians (upper case "C") onto correction, direction, perfection, encouragement and growth and not -- "sermon-etts" for "christian-etts" (lower case "c") -- 10 minute feel-good-warm-fuzzy sermon-etts.  {Truly Born Again Christians, upper case "C" possessors, vs. christians, lower case "c" professors}

Our music should educate, inspire, encourage, fortify and lift our God, His power and His divine presence in our life and ministry Ephesians. 5:19, Colossians. 3:16 James 5:13.  Today's 7-11 ditties (7 words sung 11 times over) may be fun and have a place; they should never replace our age old Psalms and Hymns that are based upon the Word of God for worship and praise!  

Each visitor needs personal attention and deserves -- personal attention, how else will we ever discover their spiritual and physical needs?  This is every member's responsibility not just the Pastor's.

I'm going to make a suggestion from my own personal experience and practice, no visitor should ever leave our Sunday morning or evening ministry without an invitation for a meal or at very least, coffee.  Pastor, Church Family member, each of you leaves and goes somewhere, home or otherwise, to eat after the worship services.  Invite a visitor (or visiting family) to join you, and, you pay for it.  If you cannot afford to pay for the meal, ask the Church to help.  Not long ago my wife and I visited a local Church family and there was a man on a business trip who was also visiting (married man with children, 2,200 miles from home).  Mary and I observed that not a single member or even the Pastor greeted him (or us) in any way so we invited him to eat with us at the "Old Country Buffet Restaurant" about 2 miles from the church.  We had a wonderful time of fellowship and were able to be an encouragement to him.

Pastors and Board members, sending informative ministry information to a visitor's home may be a good thing but it'll never replace or be as effective as a personal home visit.  Others have said to us and - we have personally experienced -- visiting local Church Family ministries for several weeks without having anyone even invite us to a Sunday School class, a Prayer meeting or receiving so much as a phone call from the Pastor, church leader or members.  Pastors, leaders and members:

A. There is never a second opportunity for a first impression.

B. We may never have another opportunity to:

**lead that visitor to Christ, (our Lord brought them to us)

    **resolve a problem that may:

**destroy

**their marriage

 **their future or

 **cost that visitor or others, because of them, their lives creating
     a life time of pain because we didn't minister to THEIR NEEDS
     WHEN WE HAD OUR "GOD GIVEN" and "GOD ORDAINED"
     OPPORTUNITY.

As Senior Pastor, Pulpit Supply and Interim Pastor of local Church families, by simply meeting, greeting and talking with visitors as they were coming in and going out of our worship services, I have been privileged, with the Lord's leadership and direction, to restore marriages, families and be used of the Spirit to save lives.  Our LOCAL worship services are Spiritual hospitals.  There isn't a person in attendance (including the Pastor) that hasn't been under Satan's attack during the week and hasn't been wounded or discouraged.  We do not attend worship services simply out of desire or habit.  It is our Lord and Saviour, through the drawing of the Holy Spirit, Who directs each and every person into our worship services.  Each and every person is in need of encouragement and spiritual healing through the hearing of the Word of God, the singing of Hymns and songs and through personal fellowship.

PS, PASTOR:

Pastor, if your a hollerer, screamer, shouter, foot stomping and pulpit pounding preacher, shame on you.  The world hollers, screams, shouts blows their horns and abuses God's kids seven days a week, you don't need to join that crowd.

Take a lesson from Elijah.  Elijah was having a physical, emotional and spiritual breakdown.

1 Kings 19:4

"But he himself went a day's journey into the wilderness, and came and sat down under a broom tree. And he prayed that he might die, and said, "It is enough! Now, Lord, take my life, for I am no better than my fathers!" 

He was physically, emotionally and spiritually exhausted, just like many of your congregation:

1 Kings 19:11-12 
Then He said, "Go out, and stand on the mountain before the Lord." And behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind tore into the mountains and broke the rocks in pieces before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake; [12] and after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire a still small voice. [13] And it came about when Elijah heard it, that he wrapped his face in his mantle, and went out and stood in the entrance of the cave. And behold, a voice came to him and said, "What are you doing here, Elijah?"

You're a spiritual physician working and operating in a spiritual hospital -- a quiet zone.  Has your Lord and Saviour ever hollered, screamed, shouted, stomped His feet or pounded His pulpit with you?

How and what are you and your Church family doing?

The purpose of this page is to give you some ideas with which 
to approach your Pastor, Church board and Church family
for Godly encouragement and change.

How can I encourage you?

This is my personal mailbox.
How are you doing?  How can I encourage you?

Sincerely,
Rev. Robert J. Kuiphoff (Pastor K) 

Please be advised, Rev. Robert J. Kuiphoff is an Ordained Minister of the Word of God and is not a licensed Psychologist, Psychiatrist or Medical Physician.  Any and all counsel, suggestions and / or advice derived from www.goldenfaithbiblechurch.org, via email or telephone is based solely upon Rev. Robert J. Kuiphoff's personal convictions concerning the Word of God; his personal interpretation of the Word of God and his lengthy experience counseling and advising men, women and children concerning the Christian Life and daily walk in the world that we all live in.